Name of Snake.

My darling baby Red Mountain Racer is now known as....

Evra.(:

Christmas With a Twist.

Okay, I am aware of how much the title of this entry is like an ad for something.

But it's not.(:

MOVING ON...(:

Yesterday was X'mas eve, as you all know. Went to Curve with Harry for lunch and last minute X'mas shopping. Got Harry his present and also Imran's present. Hope you liked it! Bumped into Nadya and Nazran. I MISS YOU TWOOOO.

Had dinner at Decanter with someone.(:

Got some pretty cute texts last night from him after that. Me likes.(:

After that, fetched Nash at Pavilion, WHAII LA YU WERK SO FAR? Haha. Nevermind, DIVA necklace on the way!:D

After sending Nash home and dropping him off at Tropicana City Mall, I fetched Arnold and Harry. Didn't know what to do so went to Solaris Bestari for YamCha session. LOL SESSION.

After that, fetched Imran and Umar and we went to teach Harry how to drive. Arnold taught him la. We just watched on. Got to catch up on a lot with Imran after so long tak jumpa.(:

Had a great time la jugak. Heheee.(:

So yeah. I got a snake for X'mas! Red Mountain Racer. SUPERCUTE I LOVE!♥♥

Problem is, I need a name for it. Something that suits both sexes. LOL.

'Cause first of all I dunno the sex of it, second of all, I like names that is unisex.(:

Here are a few names I have in consideration. HELPPPP!!!!

1. Akeyra

2. Evra

3. Nyoka

4. Onyx

Okay I really don't know but somehow Evra and Akeyra have a ring to it. Just comment or write in cbox about which one you prefer. If you have your own opinion of names, tell me.(:

xxoo,

AdyyIskandar.♥♥

In A Very Merry Mood.<3

Hey Boy.

Hello hello hello.

I've been missing for so long.

I don't know why.

I think I've just been too busy.

Too much on my mind.

Then I found you again.

You make me so happy.

Even when I don't deserve to be.

I don't love you, but I feel something.

I like you.

It's a start;

It's not much,

But I like you.

I know you may not feel that way.

I know you may think of me as a younger sister or friend.

But that's okay.

I still like you anyway.

Until you find the right girl for yourself.

I would love to be that girl.

But maybe I'm not what you want.

It's okay, I understand.

I don't go for looks baby, I go for the heart.

Sounds very fairytale, you say?

Tell me which fairytale prince is not good-looking?

You're still perfect to me,

When others might say you're not.

You make my heart beat faster;

You make my heart beat slower.

In fact, you make it beat faster and slower at the same time.

It's not love, but it's almost there.

It's not perfect, but I can try to make it good enough.

I'm not the stereotypical girlfriend type,

But I'm myself.

I like you, boy.

And I actually wish on wishing stars and wishing wells for you to like me to.

xxoo,

AdyyIskandar.♥♥

Baby I Wish That You Were Mine .

Dumbfounded.

In a few hours, I will be sitting for my last paper for my finals, Film Studies.

The next day, I'm leaving for Penang with friends. Oh, the joy of relaxation.

Downside of it is that I am having my period. I mean not like I won't wanna get into the water or anything but I would be reluctant to because its just uncomfortable.

I'm guessing this is one of the most normal posts I've written in so long.

Loving the World AIDS Day making twitter go RED today.♥

You know how people hang decorations on their rear-view of their cars? I just thought of what I wanna hang up there. MISTLETOE. NO, it is not because I want my passengers to kiss me while I drive, I just like mistletoes. Huge furry dices and rabbit feet are just too cliche.

I want to watch PRICELESS(this has been out since 2006) starring Audrey Tautou.

I also really want to watch COCO BEFORE CHANEL starring Audrey Tautou.

I need to make money. Get a part time job or something. Yeah, maybe not.

My blog post does not make sense.

I want to correct how people pronounce my nickname, "Adyy". They tend to call me "EDDIE". But with my close friends, Edi is okay because they're special and I give them worse names than that.

Getting so used to sleeping on the floor that I'm currently sitting on the floor of my room which I placed my comforter on as a substitute form of a mattress while studying and hopefully falling asleep on it soon.

Just had 0% fat yogurt. Seriously, I wonder how they make it 0%. I guess its all bollocks.

I want to study overseas.

Been very dark and bloody murderous/suicidal lately. Not literally, just the way I act and think.

I think being secretive about my problems is the best way right now. Too many conflicts to handle. I don't need my friends to be burdened so this is what I chose for my own good.

My uncle usually switches the modem off around this time.

If I don't get to post this, I wrote this on the 2nd of December 2009, at 3:57am at the respected venue I've mentioned earlier.

If this gets posted, lovely.




xx.


Adieu,
AdyyIskandar.

Disappear.

I'm going.

No, I'm gone.

I'm playing the disappearing act and I'm gonna see if anyone cares.

But I had my test run,

And who cared? NOBODY.

Thanks a lot.

No more kisses, no more hugs.

SCREW YOU FAKE PEOPLE.

AdyyIskandar.

Goodbyes.

I've been thinking a lot lately.

Maybe a little too much.

But I've come up with a conclusion.

It's simple and I don't know why I haven't discovered it all this while.

I'm gonna leave.

I've been a burden to so many people who were so patient with me.

I've been interrupting with people's lives so much that I feel like such an arse for that.

I've been thinking too much that it ruins my mood, which makes me ruin other people's moods too.

So I'm leaving.

Not on a jet plane.

I'm not going to turn back.

I'm not going to hate myself for doing this.

I need to find myself.

I need to find out what I'm supposed to be doing in life.

I need to drift away and leave all those who suffered in my account.

I need to free them of this huge burden I've been putting on them all this while.

What was i thinking?

I can't have everything I wish for.

I have to work for it.

I can't just burden someone who doesn't deserve more shit in their lives.

I mean, everyone has their own problems to resolve.

And stupid me, without thinking; Adds to the burden that already exists.

I'm leaving.

And I'm going to keep going until I find out what to do with myself.

Until I find out why I'm always like this.

Until I learn to appreciate the little things and not ask for more.

I need to grow up.

So thank you to those who have shown me a greater love than love itself; Friendship.

I love all of you to bits.

PleadingGuilty,

AliceAdriannaSabki.

*I Don't Deserve Special Treatment*

Sayang.

I constantly ask myself how I could survive without having a special someone to love me and me loving him back. After a long period of reconciling myself, I found the answer. The answer to how I could go through so much pain and depression but tend to lift myself up so quickly. It is because of them. My family, my friends. 

Without them, I don't think I could have been comforted through all my misery.

Without them, I don't think I could have the strength to smile right now. 

Without them, I don't think I could cry tears of joy when I think of how they've always been there.

Without them, I don't think I could have ever figured out the true meaning of love.

Without them, I don't think I could be alive and well right now.

Without them, I would not be the grateful person I am right now.

So thank you, Mama, Affendy, Nashrina, Sabira, Nadya, Arshad, Johan. You guys are all I need in this world to make me feel secure about my life. I promise to be there whenever you need me.

I love you guys.

xxoo,

AdyyIskandar.♥♥

*JatuhlahEgoAkuSekejap*

To New Beginnings.

Okay the title for this blog post sounds so TV show title. LOL. Anyschmoos, I'm here today to tell you about how happy I am with life.

I love my family because only god knows how much more I can love them and my dear, dear, friends. I think I have found almost all the friends I need including old friends. I love you guys so much.

My post seems happy, no?

We all know Alice. And we all know her life ain't perfect. So I'll start rambling now. If you had an ex-boyfriend who wanted to know if you still loved him, or some stalker girl who wanted to know if you still loved him; How much more desperate can you get. Based on what I recently experienced, like a FEW MINUTES AGO, I have come up with two possible theories;

1. The ex-boyfriend created an email account disguising himself as a girl and added me on MSN; asking me stuff about whether I do still go out with him and if I still love him and stuff. Despite that, if it were not him, what kind of guy who was going for some girl would tell her that I dumped him because of his attitude. (mind you, i do not remember. It's been months la, you infant.) If you wanted to know if I still loved you, its actually pretty simple. Ask me face to face rather than try to dig up secrets that I think I have let go a long time ago. We're at an age where we can think at a more mature stage and solve problems as adults. This is clearly very childish and kinda unacceptably stupid.

2. There IS a stalker girl who is madly in love with the ex-boyfriend but is so childish to think that after I still love him even though we have OFFICIALLY ENDED our relationship MONTHS AGO. So she asks me questions like whether I do love him and stuff after I told her "He is a nice guy la. Don't worry, I do not still love him what so ever. Go for him. :)" Note that I did use a smiley at that. How more convincing do you want me to be for you to ask me whether I'm SURE or NOT.

The conclusion is, whoever the culprit is, this is a very childish way of asking such questions to someone. Seriously, I broke up with him months ago. No more feelings what so ever. Dude, I don't know if other people have noticed, but its about time we all kinda start growing up. Solve situations like this like adults. Acting childish is fun but it certainly has its limits. And c'mon man, if you and your ex had broken up MONTHS ago, and you were the one who dumped the ex; I ask you, "would you have moved on already?" Duhh, I THINK SO.

This is Alice Adrianna giving you(that person in particular) a tight bitch-slap.

P/S: Nedi, you see what problems we face? Grrrr.

xxoo,

AdyyIskandar.♥♥

*THANKYOULOVELYPEOPLEFORALWAYSBEINGTHEREFORME*

Traumatizing, Tiring, Totally Fun Day.

Today I woke up at 1 and Mukhsin and Mukhlis were in my room. Terkejut ok. Waking up to two very awake little cousins and straight away makan lunch.

Maid pissed me off today. Dah naik lemak. Stubborn because we're too nice to them. Got message from nadya to be ready by 3pm to go to Farhana's house. I was ready at 3pm and Nadya texted that we were going about 4pm. Left the house at 5pm plus plus. We were caught in a jam for THREE FREAKING JOBLESS HOURS. This is what happened in Nadya's CLM (Cute Little Myvi) a.k.a CIK BUBBLE throughout the three hours:

• The occasional nose picking.
• I stared at car rims as usual.♥
• Nadya was trying to avoid the really big lorries that tried to cut her queue.
• We ate 3 mints each. One for each hour. One Hawaiian mint, two Eclipse mints; Each.
• Nadya cried in the car. The jam was FRUSTRATING!!
• Brains went cuckoo and we were so jakunated by Kings of Leon's Use Somebody and sang along.
• Nadya waved to some guys in the next car when they looked and laughed at us. WTF. They looked like the "Honk if Your Horny" kinda guys. Yes, Nadya went cuckoo.
• Mama called me once at 6pm and I said I was on the way to Farhana's.
• Mama called again at 7.30pm thinking I was on the way home when I was STILL ON THE WAY TO FARHANA'S! AHAHAHHAHA.
• Nadya forgot how to park when we reached Farhana's. She got it eventually.(:

We got to Farhana's house when it was already a closed house. GEDDIT? LOL. At least we got to eat the delicious CHOCOLATE CAKE omg gila nice. And nasi beriyani with daging. SEDAP SIAL.

We wrote in the guest book. Heheee.

Remember Naddy Naddums. Our company; SATISFACTION GUARANTEED™♥

Anywhoo, we had fun talking. Hehee. And I superlove Farhana's mom's angpau envelopes. So cute!

Well, we headed home at about 10pm. I think. I don't remember. Hahah. Got myself a Large McValue Meal Fillet-o-Fish and a Chocolate Sundae. YES, just for that Coca-cola cup.(:

I do not eat fries.

I do not drink soft drinks.

So I gave my fries and coke to Naddy Naddums.

Oh BTW, if you're wondering what I'm currently doing; I'm listening to Shakira's She Wolf and memorizing the lyrics. It's a Nedi-Edi-Sebi thing. Or is it Naddy-Adyy-Sabby thing. Something like that la. AHHAHAHA.;)

I'm kinda getting over him, thanks to a certain someone.;)

Hehee.

I AM CONTENT.

xxoo,

MoonBloomShakalakaNightingale.♥♥

This is What I'm Going Through.

Can't Move On-Automatic Loveletter.

You build a heart
that's strong
Walls to last long
Its paper mache

You think the

battle's won

No use for shields
And guns
You'll need them now
That the lump takes a
home in your throat
With the words that
You're choking
as you try
To tell yourself its ok
Flying by time to gaze
But never face

You're stuck in the moment when you thought you were rolling

But you cant move on

You feel like you're able to love past the moment

But you cant move on

Asking why asking why why i cant move on

You can't go please stay
No don't stay go
I'm left I'm right
I'm black I'm white

You ride a carrousel
round and round till
the sickness grows inside

that lump takes a strangling hold
squeezes tight till you're cold and tears run dry and where you once were worm now is tattered and torn crumbles and fades

You're stuck in the moment when you thought you were rolling

But you cant move on

You feel like you're able to love past the moment

But you cant move on

Asking why asking why why i cant move on

Incomplete
Typical reaction
I can't get over over
Over you

This is how the story goes
Glory in the moment

You can't move on
cant move on
cant move on

oh i can't move on

You're stuck in the moment when you thought you were rolling

But you cant move on

You feel like you're able to love past the moment

But you cant move on

Asking why asking why why i cant move on

xx.

ItsHardToMoveOn.

I Never Knew It Could Be This Hard

Its hurting me.

My heart is failing me.

I'm telling myself to stop.

Stop loving you more and more each day.

But it's hard.

It hurts too much.

I've fallen hard.

I didn't know I could be so weak.

I've never been so smitten with someone that doesn't love me back.

Why is this feeling so hard to conquer?

Each time I talk to you, it makes me fall for you even more.

But I don't want to stop talking to you.

I freaking LOVE you.

It's just gonna hurt me more if i stop talking to you.

I can't even tell you the truth.

I'm not afraid of rejection.

I've been rejected so many times that I'm used to it.

But being rejected by you would be hurtful.

And I don't want to lose you as a great friend.

I don't want to stop hanging out with you.

I don't want us to be awkward with each other.

So what am I going to do?

I'm going to keep quiet about this matter.

I'm not going to let you know.

Let me and the very little that know keep it as a secret.

Let me feel tha pain of seeing you with whichever girl wins your heart next.

Let me see you happy with her.

Let me see you smile at me because you know I'll always be there for you as your friend.

I Love You.

HeadOverHeels.♥♥

Why You? Why Now?

That feeling has come back to haunt me again.

Why now?

Why YOU??!!

I mean I know why, but how did I possibly fall for you.

Maybe you're you, thats why.

You're not afraid to show yourself to anyone and everyone.You're not the type of guy who likes to be egoistic and hide who you really are inside.

You don't brag about stuff.

You're you.

And I like it.

But how could I?

I know you, and you would NEVER fall for me.

Only looking at you can give me a smile on my face.

It hurts.

It really does.

This feels crappy.

I don't ever wanna lose you so why am I falling for you?

Why couldn't I have tricked myself into liking someone else before falling for you?

And now I'm completely lovestruck, but I don't know what to do.

You're a nice guy.

But I hate myself for falling for you.

I mean, ME and YOU??

Its never gonna happen.

Not ever.

Heartbroken.

I'm Ready.

This is it. I'm ready. This time, no backing out. I refuse to be the cowardly girl who gets pushed around for trying to keep a person happy no matter how bad the person treats me.

I have decided that I need to toughen up. Stop being such a wuss and admitting defeat each time I find the easy way out by blaming myself for something which I clearly know nothing of. I have to stop being so gullible as to listen to everyone's rambling and gossip and believing them. I have to stop believing that I can trust a person because we have so much in common and are so close because I know now that things which are too good to be true, are actually the things that make things worse.

I am sick and tired of being kicked around whether it is by my peers or even my elders. It doesn't seem fair that I always have to be at fault and other people can behave so slyly that it provokes others to see them as a more superior person compared to myself. I do not possess any powers, I do not posses any abnormalities which makes me some superior being but I do know that I have the strength and will power to think properly when holding up a conversation as to see whether what I'm hearing is right or wrong.

I have also decided that from now on, there is no possible way that I will ever allow myself to ever trust someone wholeheartedly. Not even HALFheartedly. I do not understand why some of my friends who have known me longer can start trusting someone they met through me and listen to all the bull crap they have to offer which totally gives me a bad image and the other person gets to keep a straight face. But not for long. God himself has shown me signs which eventually lead me to finding out whatever your evil scheme is this time. You should know by now that this is how it works. In this time of our lives, we DO NOT live in our high school years anymore where most people can be more dominant than some. Everybody is the same and nobody cares if you're prettier, richer or even bitchier. But too bad for you if you choose to be bitchy, it just gets you nowhere. You'll end up living with no friends, which is pretty much happening already for someone I know. Tsk tsk. Such a pity. It was so nice knowing you.

THAT up there was what I set in my mind for future friendships to come. For now, I know who I love and I know the people who love me.

BOYS. To me, boys are cowards now. I've had quite a few boys who flirted with me and even confessed that they loved me but did not want to take our friendship to the next level. Don't worry guys, I know why. Its because I'm fat. Introducing me to your friends who have girlfriends the size of twigs and less would make you feel embarrassed that you have a fat girlfriend. Not pretty too, at that. I don't care, because to me, those who are scared of that are stereotypically challenged people who have no other worries in life except showing off what they can find, even if they don't love the person. To those who love them, I understand and I respect that. But to those who are so shy to show the person they truly love to the world, that's just plain stupid.

So, to those guys who are so scared to hold my hand in public and make excuses such as "my mom's friends will see us" and so on, I say SCREW YOU. May you have a happy life regretting your loss.

I'm happy with my life right now and I think this change that I'm slowly developing is actually making me stronger in a way. Well, I guess I need some shut eye right now. Travelling around to look for Damansara while going through the same toll twice with Nadya in the awfully crowded jam made me really drowzy.

Raya coming!

Prepare those angpows you've been saving up to give me yeah, darlings.

ilypsfm.

xxoo,

Adrienne.♥♥

No More Birthdays.

I'm sick of having birthdays. WHY?? I'll tell you why. Because when I have my birthdays, people that I really hope to be there turn me down in the end. They cancel. They give bullshit reasons why they can't come. But when it's some popular person's birthday, cepat je cakap yes. I'm not chasing popularity like you and neither do I care about it, I have a wonderful life, but it hurts. During my birthday, you'd think I'd have happy dreams when I slept. But NOOOO, I cried in my sleep. I had NIGHTMARES.

This makes me think if I was even friends with the right people.

The one that ticks me off the most is when I go for other people's stuff, those people would say things like "why didn't X come?", "how could X not come?" or the occasional "some kind of friend X is for not showing up". Well, goes to show you're the kind that attends everyone's party. And has a big heart. More like big FART. Did you come for MY party? You DID??!! Oh wow, I certainly didn't see you there.

I am now an antiself-celebration person. I would love attending parties and celebrating my friends' birthdays, but not mine. No matter how old I get, I won't bother to celebrate my birthday. When's my birthday again? Oh wait, I don't have one anymore. I just know that I'm a year older each year. That's better. Doesn't make me look forward to people coming for my birthday or getting presents or even meeting up with ANYONE during my birthday. As of now, June 21st is no longer important to me.

I love everyone, I will go to their parties when invited from now on, but I swear, I will NEVER EVER have a birthday party every again. Too many expectations. Too much time wasted. I could do many things in one day rather than wait for last minute phone calls cancelling on me. I don't care if anyone terasa because HOW DO I FEEL after all you've put me through? All the money I spent to prepare for the party. All the credit wasted to text or call you people. All the time wasted when I could do more productive things.

BAH.

Fuck you losers.

I'm sorry, I'm just not in a good mood right now.

As for those who have always been there for me, I love you people.

Those who are my friend just because I know people, just because I'm not pretty so that I won't outshine you when we go out with a group of boys, those who are friends with me but do not like me but are still my friend for the sake of one of your friends who is, screw YOU.

I AM PISSED OFF.

This will all be okay later, but for now, I'm just SO ANGRY.

I can only be happy when you're sorry.

adyyiskandar.

*Farewell, Prince William. For we no longer share the same birthday.*

To My Dear Friends Who Are BOYS. (& he who shall be my partner one day)

Got this from some random site.

HOW TO MAKE YOUR GIRL SMILE.(:

1. Tell her she is beautiful. – Really… this is the most basic of them all, every girl wants to hear that her partner finds her attractive.

2. Hold her hand whenever you can. – Most girls love it, it makes them feel secure and appreciated.

3. Kiss her on the forehead. – Kissing her on other places apart from the mouth, shows you love all of her and not just the “goods”. It might also have something to do with hand holding since they are both things her father would have done.

4. Leave her voice messages to wake up to. – The waking up process is quite delicate, those moments after you wake up can change your whole day.Leaving a voice message to show you care, will truly make her day.

5. Always tell her shes the only girl you wanna be with. – Some girls really need reassurance about this, so telling her once in a while won’t hurt.

6. When she is upset tell her how much she means to you. – It helps her look on the bright side of things, knowing she has someone by her side to help her get through anything thats upsetting her.

7. Recognize the small things. – Anyone can recognize the big things she does, but only a person that truly cares will pay attention to everything including the small things.

8. Call her baby. – It doesn’t have to be baby, any sweet or cute nickname will do, it helps create a special boding.

9. Sing to her no matter how horrible your voice is. – They like to see your willing to make a fool out of yourself for her.

10. Pick her over all the other girls you hang out with. – This basically means, no matter what girls your hanging out with always try to be courteous towards her and leave any girl you're talking too, to ask her out and dance.

11. Write her notes. – Writing sticky notes with cute messages and leaving them around her house/workplace is just a cute detail you can do to make her feel special.

12. Introduce her to friends as your girlfriend. – Some guys make the mistake of not mentioning your girlfriend to your friends and telling them she's just some random chick, if she finds out…. May god have mercy on your soul because she won’t.

13. Play with her hair. – Another way to show you're thinking about her.

14. Pick her up, tickle her and play wrestle with her. A cool way to show your affection, everyone wants to go back and be a kid again for a few minutes.

15. Talk to her without having to kiss her. – If your relationship is about a kiss for every 3 words you say to each other, try and get to know her more. Kissie Kissie will only get you so far.

16. Tell her funny jokes, tell her stupid jokes, just tell her jokes. – Laughter has been and always will be one of the best ways to build a strong relationship.

17. Tell her when you miss her. – Call her at her work or in between classes to remind her she is being missed, leave her notes, even a sms message will do.

18. Let her fall asleep in your arms. – Helps her feel loved and secure.

19. Open her car door. – Shows her your courteous.

20. If she’s mad at you, kiss her. – It shows no matter how pissed off you guys are at each other, the most important feeling will never change.

21. Give her piggyback rides. – Being child-like and showing immaturity is always cute in a relationship.

22. Randomly tell her when you think she looks her best. – Helps her build confidence and shows that you notice her efforts to look good.

23. Treat her the same around your friends as you do when your alone. – Don’t treat her differently in front of your friends too seem cool or macho, you're just going to loose points.

24. Look her in the eyes and smile. – A silent way to show your thinking about her.

25. Let her take as many pictures of you as she wants. – Some girls like to take pictures of you.Just go with the flow and let them do it, they want to have reminders of you.

26. Slow dance with her, even if there isn’t any music playing. – Random gestures of affection always help.

27. Don’t ever ignore her, no matter who is around. – There are some girls who need to know that you take her in consideration, totally ignoring her for someone else will get you into trouble.

28. Kiss her in the rain/flowers petals on her bed. – Anything romantic that sounds corny works like a charm.

29. Tell her everything thats going on your in your life. – Telling her about your day, all the little things that happen will show her that you confide in her and make her feel like shes someone you appreciate so much you can tell her your most intimate feelings.

30. WHEN you fall in love with her . . . Tell her. – Don’t tell her just for the heck of it, wait for the right time when you really mean it.If they find out you told her without meaning it, it will be a HUGE let down.

So yeah guys, DO these things for her. And to anyone out there who shall be my boyfriend/husband soon, TAKE NOTE!!

SpreadingLoveAround,

adyyiskandar.♥♥

*Release your inner CORNY MAN from within.*